Podcast Episode 2 - The Integration Block

This entire post is going to be about one of the biggest reasons why people get caught up in their manifestation process. I like to call this the integration block, but there's this pattern that I see where people will learn about manifestation. Maybe they'll take a course or two courses, and they're able to manifest a couple of things, but they haven't integrated enough of their, I mean in my perspective, enough of their human design. They are not in alignment enough with their energy, and they're not letting their manifestations become a conscious, integrated process. You're only manifesting from your conscious mind. I want to go into detail about this pattern, and I'm going to show you what the secret is to getting into a space where manifestation is a process that you live by. It's a lifestyle, and it's not something that is exhausting and makes you feel like you are just trying to imagine something and essentially suspend your disbelief.

With manifestation, there are two terms that we need to differentiate. If you're coming to this platform from a human design perspective, the term manifestation is to take something that has not been created or something that is internal energy that is in motion, this can be emotional energy, this can be willpower, this is motorized energy of some kind, and you are bringing it out of you. You are taking some sort of motorized energy from inside of you, and you're bringing it into the outer world. That's the term manifestation, according to human design.

If you're looking at the term manifestation from a law of attraction perspective, or more of a new aged perspective, this term means to take something that was, I believe Kathrin Zenkina talks about this as her definition, but to take something that was once imaginary and then to experience it in real life. So very similar energy, and I talk about manifestation through the lens of creating, and intentionally creating the life that you desire.

When we are consciously co-creating, we are thinking about the things that we like to experience, how we would like to feel when we experience them, and we are working towards creating a life where we are comfortable. Something that I think is really important to differentiate is that when we're manifesting, we're not just manifesting one external experience, you're manifesting holistically. There's an internal experience that's also associated with the manifestation and where you're going.

Let's say, you are currently miserable in your job, and you want to manifest a free business. A business where you have freedom or you have location freedom, where you have financial freedom, where you get to do whatever it is that you want, and you feel really, really good. There are actually two things that you are trying to manifest in that experience. You want the external situation of job location freedom; you want a position where you have a little bit more control. There is also a feeling that's associated here as well, that you're also trying to manifest.

While you want, let's say the money or the job or this particular career, you also want to feel a certain way, inside of that position. When we're manifesting, we have to realize that there's two points of attraction; There's not just one point of attraction. We're looking at internal state and external experience.

Your internal state is how you feel in that situation, and if you are not clear around how you want to feel in that situation, you're going to continue to bring the feelings and sensations and that body's experience into this next step, into this next version of you, like into that career that you have just manifested. I see a lot of people learn how to consciously manifest because we're actually working on a conscious and an unconscious level here for that internal and that external experience. When we are creating the external experience, when we're consciously manifesting, we tend to focus on the suspension of disbelief that happens. Where you're focusing on creating the vision, you're visualizing the future, you're visualizing the job, and you're ignoring how you feel. You're ignoring where you currently are. You're ignoring what you see in your current reality. You're rejecting it. You're saying, "Nope, it's going to look like this. It's going to look like this. It's going to look like this". This is your conscious mind overwriting and rejecting the reality that you are creating from your unconscious.

We actually fully manifest from our unconscious, and the conscious mind just has the ability to override this occasionally, but the conscious mind burns a lot of calories. The conscious mind is exhausting. The conscious mind takes a lot of energy to keep up with. That's why your conscious memories become unconsciously stored, and that's where it's long-term memory. That's where you can keep it, but you don't have to be thinking about it constantly in order to remember it.

Let's tie this back down into the integration block. When people first learn about manifestation, when you first went about anything, you are consciously learning. That cognitive learning is a conscious ability, and that's where you're manifesting from. The concept of, I see it everywhere in the coaching industry, but this focus on "I'm going to manifest a $50K month this month. I'm going to manifest a $50K month this month, or $60K month," where you are holding onto this, "I have no idea how it's going to happen. I have no idea where this is going to come from, but it's going to come out of thin air".

That is one form of manifestation, where you're pulling something that feels very, very far away into your experience. Because it feels like something that it's hard for you to believe is possible for you, it takes a lot of conscious thought. Every time your body says, "I actually don't think that's going to happen," you have to say, "Actually, no. I do think it's possible that I can have a $50K month this month. I do think that it can happen, even though I don't have a process or a plan. I do believe that it can show up, and that I am open and available for miracles." You're essentially using your conscious mind to say 'no,' and to reject everything that your unconscious is coming up and saying like, "Hey, this has been my truth."

You can do this for a certain amount of time. You can say, "Conscious, I'm going to manifest a $50K a month this month," and then the next month you say, "Okay, cool. I can manifest a $50K month this month," and what happens here and the pattern that I see is you're only focused on that external experience, and you're not allowing it to become an integrated process.

If you're consciously manifesting $50K months, you're going to continually need to consciously manifest $50K months. You're going to have to focus on it and suspend that disbelief and convince yourself that it's possible over and over and over again, and be open for a miracle over and over and over again, which is one way. Or you can recognize that maybe you desire to have $50K months just be your baseline. Where you want a business and you want a system in place where you receive that no matter what, whether you're consciously manifesting it or not.

The thing that I see, and I see this really a lot in the coaching industry, because it's a really easy space to manifest money quickly, is in this coaching industry, because you are in charge of your prices, you're in charge of what you want to be offering, you're in charge of your marketing, and it's a really easy place to make a lot of money quickly. What I see are people learning how to create a launch or they're learning how to create a program, they're learning how to sell for the first time, and the actions that you take while you're creating something, that's the recipe for what you're creating. You get into this cycle where you have to constantly be suspending your disbelief, and you have to be rejecting your body's reality, and you have to be working against the programming that your body has to say, "No, I believe that it's possible for this to happen this month. No, I do believe that it's possible".

What this does is this is quite literally your nervous system fighting itself. This is the mental equivalent of an autoimmune disease, essentially, where your thoughts and your conscious mind are fighting your unconscious. What needs to happen, and this is why I call this the integration block, you have to be willing to dig up all of those things in your unconscious and pay attention to them and actually decide to rewrite them. The reason we have these blocks, let's say you got into the coaching industry, and you manifested a $10,000 month, and now you're trying to get to consistent $10K months. You've done it once. You've done it twice, but it's not consistent. It's only on those big launch months. Your brain may be saying that you have to be launching every single month in order to continue to maintain that amount of financial freedom.

If you want $10K months every single month, currently in your reality, what you would need to do is be launching something every single month. If in five years, do you want to launch something every single month, just so that you can keep hitting that number? You have to look at the actions that you're taking, because if your body is saying that that is what you have to do, and what's true for you and your body is saying you doesn't have sustainable income, and you have to work for your money, all of these stories that you're storing in your unconscious and all of the beliefs that you have around money, they don't just go away if you ignore them. You have to acknowledge them and decide differently. That acceptance is a huge part that people are ignoring entirely.

We feel like once we are consciously aware of money. You've done some money work. You know the affirmations, you know that you're a money magnet, and that you're open to abundance and whatever the money mantras are; you understand the energy and the frequency of money. What happens is we judge ourselves if we consciously know these things to be true; we judge ourselves anytime there is a thought that disagrees with that particular truth. Let's say, you know that money is an unlimited resource, and so if that's true for you, and then you are consciously manifesting this launch, or you're consciously manifesting a $10,000 month, and this fear pops up of, "What if I can't make it happen this month?" You're having some doubts, and you're having some fears, and you're having some hesitations, the judgmental part of you that says, "That's backsliding. I can't believe I'm still having those thoughts". The part of you that judges that and sees that as, "Oh no, I'm doing something wrong," is actually inhibiting your ability to grow through that.

Whenever those thoughts and those fears come up, it's not that you are backsliding, it's not that you are getting in your own way, it's actually that you are being given an opportunity to integrate something into your unconscious. That means that deep down in your programming, I've worked through this at ancestral levels at this point, the conditioning that pops up in the feelings and the emotions that come up to me to be reframed every single time I'm manifesting, every single time I'm stepping into a new level, at this point, they're not even mine anymore. They're not things that I learned, they are things that I have unconsciously and genetically inherited from the past generations. They really don't make sense at this point, but I can recognize that this is an opportunity for me to integrate this thought, integrate this belief, at a deeper level.

If you are someone who feels like you are here to be a light worker, to be healing the collective around you to be, and you want to heal ancestral trauma. You want to be working with your DNA. These patterns are going to consistently come up because you are constantly being given an opportunity to integrate it at a deeper and deeper level. I've done so much work around money that sometimes the things that pop up around money are not mine. If I judge myself and say that this idea that I have around money or this belief that I have, of, what if it runs out, that doesn't have to make sense for me, and it doesn't have to be a judgment. I don't have to judge myself for having that thought and say, "You've done so much money work at this point, how can you still be having these thoughts? Has none of it worked?" There could either be a ton of self-judgment, or there can be a ton of self-acceptance. I say, "Wow, I get to integrate this at a deeper level, and I get to show myself again, I get another opportunity to show myself that I get to live in abundance".

Being an abundant person, and this is where we are integrating things at an identity level, if you are an abundant person, if you're working on behavior and identity, which I think are both very important, if you're working at an identity level and you are an abundant person, the skill of being abundant is being able to look at scarcity and to have scarce thoughts, and to choose to tune back into that frequency of abundance anyways. At this point in my working with money, my inner work and my shadow work that I have had to do around money, I genuinely feel like I am an abundant person. Not necessarily because of the money that's flowing through my experience, but because I have the ability to feel thoughts of scarcity and choose to integrate at a deeper level, the thoughts of abundance. I am replacing it every single time.

Your conscious mind is an important part of this. We consciously choose new thoughts; this is conscious integration. First, you need to accept whatever's coming up because it's coming up as an opportunity for you to integrate at a deeper level, instead of ignoring it. When we ignore it, and when we are saying, "I shouldn't be feeling this. I shouldn't be feeling this doubt," that's really where this block gets in the way. You're not willing to feel those doubts anymore. You feel like you should've gotten over them. You feel like it's only going to come up once, so you're going to work through it, and it's going to go away forever.

The integration is recognizing that your shadows pop up at every level, and the gift is created when you go through the shadow. Feeling it through is how you're going to get that clarity, and experiencing whatever it is that you're experiencing, and being honest with that emotional experience is going to let you integrate and accept at a deeper level. That acceptance is key to actually shift in emotion. If you're able to shift the emotion, what you're doing is instead of consciously rejecting and needing to have your conscious mind hold this vision of perfection and hold this vision of abundance and then your body being stuck and traumatized in a state of lack, you're not going to be in that duality anymore. You don't have to fight with yourself. Accepting that you're having these shadows is the ability to replace that shadow at a deeper level in your body and in your unconscious mind with the frequencies of abundance.

This is actually how we're going to go about changing our DNA and, this is where human design and gene keys really get into changing your DNA, is when you're able to recognize the shadows and you're able to move through them and you're able to replace them and recode that body and recode your nervous system to hold the frequencies of higher and higher levels of abundance, and things that support our evolution instead of hindering our evolution. Currently in our society, thought work is the biggest issue in our evolution. Physical evolution, we are our own worst enemies; we're not taking care of our bodies. That's the biggest threat to humanity physically, on an evolutionary plane. But mentally and emotionally, that's where we have a lot that we can let go of, and so there's going to be room for more development later on, once we're able to let go of all of the junk in our DNA, all of the thoughts and the beliefs that no longer serve us. Specifically, around money and around our relationships to other people, because it's not serving us as a collective to believe that money is scarce, and to believe that there's never enough. That's something that so many of us have encoded in our bodies, and we have this physical response and this physical trauma to all things financial, because our bodies are afraid of it. Our bodies have this fear and this belief that we are not safe, and we do not have access to abundance.

If that's true for our bodies, if you're consciously manifesting, you're going to get stuck at a certain level when your body is so separated from your mind. If you're consciously saying, "I'm manifesting $100,000 months", but your body says something along the lines of, "There's never enough, and I don't know if I have enough money to eat," it doesn't matter if you have six figures in your bank account, if your body is still worried about, "Am I going to be able to afford food." Your actions are still going to be and your behaviors are still in a mimic that energetic state. That's where your body is. You're not going to be able to get to a space where you are comfortable spending that money and you feel secure in abundance, because it's two things that you're manifesting here; ideally what we want to manifest is that internal space and that internal sensation of safety and security with finances and comfortability and freedom and joy. Those are not possible if you're not integrating at a deeper level. If  you're just consciously saying, "I'm going to manifest six figures, I'm going to manifest six figures," and you think that consciously convincing yourself that this magical miracle of six figures is going to save your life and make you feel better, you've got it backwards.

If you want to have an experience where you're both making a lot of money and you feel safe spending that money, you have to recognize that you're manifesting two separate things, and there are two separate things that you have to be working on. You are working on your relationship to money, and you're working on your comfortability being an abundant person, the behaviors and the identity here. That identity, if that's really where you're integrating at an unconscious level, being someone who is abundant means that you feel safe in abundance, no matter what, that's where we're changing our DNA.

Let me recap really quickly. This integration block is where we are consciously manifesting, and we're not allowing ourselves to deepen that integration, and we're not allowing ourselves to be honest about what we're feeling. We have this fear around having negative thoughts and what that means about us, and we have all these stories around because I know that money is abundant, I shouldn't feel like I am in a state of lack. You feel like if you're in a state of lack, you're doing something wrong, which is not the case. If you have the awareness of abundance and you're experiencing lack, you have an opportunity to choose abundance over lack and to recode your genetics and recode your identity, and step into a new level of alignment.

That's an opportunity. It does not mean that you are doing something wrong, it means that you are doing something incredibly right, and that you have this beautiful opportunity to integrate at a deeper level. These shadows and these patterns are going to come up over and over again, and at some point, you're actually going to get comfortable with them and you're actually going to get familiar with them, and it's almost relieving when you see the same pattern over and over again, because you know the answer. You're like, "Ah, yes. Okay. I feel this, and then I feel this, and then I feel this, and then I get to let it go, and then I get to move through this".

If you are judging yourself anytime you have a negative thought come up, or any time you are not the perfect love and light abundance individual, if you're struggling with anything, there's no judgment around that. It means that you're giving yourself an opportunity to integrate at a deeper level, and it means that you're going to start to manifest and you're just starting to become and be. You're changing your identity around becoming an abundant person. If it's around loving, if it's around abundance, if it's around understanding, whatever that means for you, I just used abundance as a fun example for today's episode.

If you're having a block with abundance, or if you're having a block in your manifestation process, it might mean that your conscious mind is a little bit exhausted of suspending disbelief and trying to consciously create the entire reality alone. It's a co-creation process for a reason, and so if you want to co-create a little bit more easily, a little bit more sustainably, then you might want to look into some trauma work, some deconditioning, and some self-acceptance work, because when you recognize that these shadows aren't going away. You get to start to create routines and habits that support you when these shadows pop up, and you get to deal with them and manage them, and you feel like you become the abundant person who's able to always switch to that state of abundance, and then they become less of a big deal.

So, take your power back. Don't let the issues feel overwhelming. You're not a victim of them. Do some integration work!

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