Podcast Episode 3 - Manifesting My Dream Home

I am really, really excited to share this particular story with you because it's been highly requested by lots of people. If you've seen the title of this blog, you know that I am talking about manifesting my dream home, and specifically we're going to go through the premeditation phase, how this decision came up, the signs and the feelings and the nudges that I was getting that told me intuitively and set the stage for. I knew that we were going to be moving to a new location and somewhere we hadn't been before. I want to talk about all the different charts that I looked at to make an energetically informed decision around where we should be moving, how the location is going to affect us, and all the details around the different pieces of information that I took into consideration for making this decision. I'm going to bring you through how I chose where are we going to move, the manifestation process, the actual decision making process for purchasing the house, and then my biggest takeaways from this entire experience.

We have a lot to discuss. I think we should just dive in to talking about the premeditation phase. I'm calling this a premeditation phase because I think that I do everything in my head before I actually do it. I knew we were probably going to be moving at some point; I was getting these feelings of just think about it, just play with the idea of where would we want to move? Where do we want to go? What kind of place would we need? What kind of location would we need? What would feel comfortable? Just playing with in an ideal world, where would I live? What kind of things would I need? What resources would I feel I need in that location? I was just playing with the idea of and the potential of moving.

In the first several months of feeling into this and thinking about "I'm probably going to move from the house that I'm in someday in the next couple of years," it feels very vague. Honestly, this entire process felt very vague, and I had very little clarity around anything until these last two weeks when everything has fallen into place. There was this nudge; the furniture in my house is not quite fitting in the way that I want it to, and I keep rearranging things, and it just doesn't quite feel right. Then, most of my plants were dying because there's just not enough sunshine in this house, and I really miss that sunshine. I find myself really tired all the time; I'm physically tired and I don't want to spend a lot of time outside in the current location we're in. I find myself not leaving my house very much because there's not a lot of things around me that I enjoy doing, or places where I feel really energetically not drained. A lot of locations near me drain me a lot, and so I spend a lot of time at home. I'm just looking at, in the environment that I'm in and in the location that I'm in, I'm not thriving. I'm making the most of it and I'm doing great with it, but we've been here for six years, and I'm not thriving in this environment.

So, I just started playing with what kinds of things would make me thrive in an environment? I started looking at everything that made me frustrated in the current moment, and everything that made me frustrated was how far away I am from everything. The closest Target is 45 minutes away from my house. We have a Walmart in town, but the closest next big store like that, is at least half an hour away from us. There are not a lot of options food wise. I have celiac disease. I eat gluten-free and have for the past 13 years. There are not a lot of options in the area that are gluten-free accommodating, or there are really just not a lot of variety where we are, and I like variety in my diet and I like variety of my foods. Community has been hard for me in this area. It was easier when I was in college because I had classes, I had regular activities I had to go to, and that helped me with socializing and creating a really good community. But currently, because most of the friends that I made a nursing school have moved away, I have a couple of friends locally, but again, I don't really leave my house.

It was recognizing that it's hard for me to really be in alignment with me, and so thinking about like my Pearl, which is 54.3. For me, really being in alignment with the energy of abundance means ascending to new levels, and it means when I rise, we rise. It's on tribal circuitry, and the line three is about celebration. It's been hard for me to really celebrate the success that I've created and celebrate myself and celebrate my life, in this particular environment, because it feels like there's so much effort that needs to be put into it. In order for me to celebrate with a really nice dinner, the nice restaurant that we like, it's over an hour and a half away from our house. Yes, it's a really fun experience, but going that far out of our way, makes it feel like more of a hassle than it does enjoyment. There is not a lot of enjoyment in the celebratory activities that we have here.

I am a person who's really good at making the best out of situations, and so it's even hard for me to acknowledge that I have not been perfectly happy here, because it makes me feel like I am ungrateful for the resources that I have, I'm ungrateful for the environment that we have, I'm ungrateful for the people that have been in my life here, and I am so grateful for everything. I am so, so, so grateful, but I'm ready for a change. I'm capable of holding both of those emotions. I'm capable of both appreciating what I have, and what I've been able to receive in this environment and who I've been able to become in this space, and I can also be simultaneously extremely ready to reinvent myself and step into a new identity, a new version of me in a new environment.

In the premeditation phase, I was getting these nudges of in my dream life, my husband's not going to be in the military forever. That was a really big thing to me. That was something that I've known for a really long time, is that at some point my husband is not going to be in the military, and he's going to be able to find something that he is passionate about, something that he enjoys. But this ultimate vision for me, is that he is satisfied with the work that he does, and he has some sort of vocation that gives him that satisfaction. He needs something to keep him busy, because I am a busy person, and I really like being busy, and I really like the work that I do. I need him to be distracted and also happy, so that I have enough time and space to do the work that I want to do, and he's able to also meet me at that level of we were both satisfied with our jobs.

That was the vision that I was holding for him, and I've seen a lot of people ask questions around, how do you manifest things for other people, and really it's about seeing the potential for them, doing it for yourself, creating the level of success that you want, and for me, it's been about being a role model and saying, "I can make the hard decisions to go after the things that I want and to advocate for my own satisfaction and for my own happiness," and that's given him permission to do the exact same thing. So, he came home one day, and I could tell he was nervous. He was a little anxious, and he says, "I don't think I want to be in the military forever. I think I'm done." I was overjoyed for him to make this decision, and I really held that space for "I'm going to stay in my lane. I'm going to do what I do best. I'm going to keep pursuing my joy. I'm going to keep pursing my happiness, and I'm going to let him come to that conclusion on his own". He deserves that, and he deserves to create that for himself and not feel like someone outside of him is responsible for his happiness. So, I held that space for him, and then once he decided, he narrowed down and responded to a bunch of the different things, and he's figured out what he wants to do. He looked at different colleges in the area for specific programs. He wants to go into vet tech nursing, and so he chose a couple of different locations. We brainstormed, just threw out a bunch of ideas, and then I went into my chart reading, analytical mindset mode.

The charts I pulled up, obviously I pulled up our human design chart. In our connection chart, we have eight centers defined and one undefined, and we have a single definition. We have everything defined in our human design charts except for our identity center, except for this G center. We are very location independent, and we are directionally independent, and we are identity independent. In connection charts, when two people come together, you put that energy on top of each other. Between the two of us, we have access to pretty much everything, except for a sense of self and a sense of identity and a sense of direction; who are we and where are we going in life is this wide open to the possibilities of just about anything happening. What we get to do is we get to explore different versions of love, different identities, different behavior patterns, different locations; we get to be whoever we want to be, and there was a lot of flexibility.

Because of this undefined G center, we're also, what we call in human design, geomagnetic. My husband and I are both very geomagnetic, which means the geographical location of where we are, so our environment, really impacts our magnetism, and our sense of identity and our sense of direction. I knew that for us as a couple, the location that we are in is very important for our sense of self, our sense of direction, our identity, and our personal development, essentially. Looking at different locations, I wanted to make sure that we were both supported in what we need, in our environment styles, in everything energetically, when I was choosing a place to live.

Then I pulled up our individual charts. I'm a passive mountains environment, and my husband is an active environment, left facing arrow, and natural shores. We've got natural shores, and we have passive mountains as our environment styles. I've been reading a lot around micro-environments, and how that works, and so one of the things that really impacted me in the environment that we are in currently is that it has become a very markets focused place, and it is not working for either of us. The house that we have, we're a corner lot, and so our backyard faces, we have a sidewalk that goes along the entire thing, and we have a house next to us. Across the street, they have built three houses within the past year and a half that we have lived here that look into our backyard. I spend a lot of time in the backyard with our dogs, they cut down a lot of trees and so a lot more houses can see us, and it feels like everyone can see into our backyard.

On top of that, because it's a one-story house and because of the direction that it faces, there's just not a lot of light. It feels like a cave in the middle of a markets environment, and so for both of us, it feels like I'm exposed, and also like, I can't see anything. I am exposed, the spotlight's on me, everyone is looking into my backyard from the street, from literally everywhere, and it feels like everyone is watching me, and it feels like my house is dark and I can't see anything. That is what I physically feel in our environment.

Looking at shores natural, my husband will do well where there are natural shores. For him, specifically, being closer to the ocean will be very helpful, as opposed to being in the middle of nowhere. Being near the ocean is going to be really helpful for his environment, so we were starting to look coastal, most of the options that he gave me were coastal anyways. We were looking at places like New York, maybe Washington state, and Florida.

I looked at his environment, and I looked at mine. I need a place where I can get away from people, and being able to have perspective is really helpful. Natural light is something that's really helpful for me. I don't know what it is, maybe it's a mountains environment thing, maybe it's just a personal preference, but having lots of sunshine, I'm essentially a houseplant, having lots of sunshine makes me feel energized, it makes me feel awake, makes me feel like I can breathe. I knew that I needed something spacious. I needed something bright. I needed something open. I needed a space where I felt like I could breathe.

I was looking at both micro and macro environments for this, there is some sort of astrological event where after that point, your human design environment actually starts to really affect you, and before that, it doesn't really matter as much. We're both before that; we haven't hit our Saturn return, we haven't hit our Uranus opposition, we haven't really hit any of those big midlife transition phases yet. So, our macro environment isn't that important to us just yet. I was really looking at the microenvironment, and that means what specifically going on inside of the house and the physical location where we're looking at.

I obviously looked at our human design charts, and then the second group of charts that I pulled up are our astrocartography charts. Astrocartography is this really cool thing where it shows you the different planetary lines for locations, and so you can start to see how different planets and how different locations will energetically affect you.

For the last sixish years, we have lived pretty much directly on my Uranus line. When you're looking at the different lines, each of the planets is going to impact you differently, and so essentially for Uranus, this particular planet deals with abrupt and unexpected adjustments that are often quite open-ended. Literally reading from the astro.com website for this particular line, there are "changes in career, getting promotions, might get into redundant patterns". I'm very motivated to create and search for more freedom and greater independence. The location we're currently in is not great for your nervous system. For me, it has this rebel and revolt against authority energy. "Social reform movements involved in new age and alternative goal setting, looking for like-minded friends, but some of your visions could very well come true". Right where we are now is essentially lots of risk taking for me. It is a lot of possible changes in "areas of electronics, computer, and data technology," which is really funny because I've gone from a nursing career to a digital career while in this location, and there's been lots of unexpected adjustments and abrupt changes here. I'm ready for a little bit more stability.

So, I looked there, looking where we are now, and then for my husband, we're pretty much directly on his Kyron line. There's a great opportunity for him to be finding his shadow side here, unresolved aspects of polarity, open-ended and unpredictable processes as well. Lots of things here; lots of potential isolation. Where we are now, looking at our charts, is not energetically the best for us, and so when I was looking at the different places, I was cool being somewhere kind of neutral.

Looking at the astrocartography for Tallahassee, which is where we are going to be moving, it's very, very neutral for me. The closest thing is going to be my sun line, but Tallahassee, specifically, we have crossing Jupiter and moon nodes, so it's pretty neutral for me. There are no specific lines through it, but clicking on that specific area, it says, "This is without a doubt, a pleasant place for you". It's going to be a very neutral experience for me; it requires very little effort. It's going to be a very harmonious energy for me, generosity, worldliness, and open-mindedness. "The people you meet here will make a significant contribution to your future endeavors". It's a great space for me, and it also says things like, "It's great for international networking, signing contracts, starting new companies or business partnerships do well here," so lots of good energy for the things that I'm about to be calling in.

For my husband, it's really close to his Neptune line. There's going to be some interesting shifts in value for him, I think. It's going to be an interesting space for him to strive for higher maybe spiritual ideas, he might tap into some mysticism and spiritual energy, but it's just a good energetic place for him as well, of all of the different locations that we looked at. We were possibly thinking of some schools in New York, but the problem with New York is that there's lots of snow there, and I'm really excited to be somewhere where it's warm. I want warmer weather, so that was also a contributing factor.

After narrowing down and looking at the different locations that fit our goals and fit the vision that we were manifesting and the different locations and feeling into that, and there were lots of emotional waves, I made the decision. I said, "Hey, I think we should move to Florida", and so my husband applied to the school in Florida. I didn't know he only applied to one school, but he only applied to one school, which was fine because he got into it, and it's the one that he wants to go to, so I really appreciate his gate 57 intuition and his ability to conserve energy. He applied to that school, so that's kind of how we chose the specific location.

When it came to choosing the actual house, my husband from the get-go was very much so, "You can probably go down there. You will have the time to find a place. I trust your decision." It was really uncomfortable for me to have that conversation because it felt like a lot of pressure and a lot of responsibility for, "Hey, you can just go down there all by yourself to this new location that you've never been before, but you think that we want to move to, and you can look at the different neighborhoods, and see if you can figure out where we want to live".

For someone with an undefined G center, that is quite literally the worst situation. My worst nightmare is going to a new location where I know nobody, trying to figure things out while I am there, figure out what areas are good, what areas are not good, and make decisions in that space as an emotional authority, because quick decisions don't necessarily happen. I was not feeling great about that. It felt very uncomfortable, very new, very difficult for me to manage, and very outside my comfort zone. I set the intention that, it's all going to work out. Everything that needs to happen for us to relocate is going to work out, and it's going to be fine. This is a go to loop of mine that I come back to over and over again when I start to feel overwhelmed: everything's going to be fine. "Everything that has happened to me so far has been fine; I have survived it, so I know that I'm going to survive this as well. Whatever needs to happen, will happen. Whatever decisions I need to make, will be made, and I know that in the moment I will be able to work through that. Whatever it is, I know that I'll be able to work through that". I talk myself down from this anxiety ledge of, "I don't know who I am. I don't know where I'm going. I don't know if I could make these decisions on my own," and we figured it out.

My sister-in-law lives two hours away from Tallahassee, and she reached out and she said, "I love looking at houses, why don't you let me look at houses for you?" A lot of this is coming from, my husband is an active environment, and pretty much everyone in his family is an active environment style. I'm a passive environment style, and so for me, being a passive environment style has meant that I get to kind of step back, and I get to watch things happen. I'm much more of an observer than I am an active participant in making my goals a reality. I kind of watch them show up for me, instead of making it happen. My sister-in-law sent me this entire list of all these different houses. She contacted a realtor. It turned out that my mother-in-law was also going to be in the area near her for a couple of days, and so the timing worked out perfectly. We all met at Jess's house, and then we drove down there, and met with a realtor, and looked at houses for one day.

The story of events here really laid out really beautifully. I went into the situation with my very specific list of dream goals. I'm a specific manifester, and I will eventually need to do another entire episode on how I understand the variables and manifestation, because it's so nuanced, detailed, and lots of layers to it, that I want to give it the full respect of having its own conversation. But I have inter vision cognition. I'm a focused view perspective individual, so my view is very focused, and so I looked at specific details. I do this from a very low expectation space, so sacred detachment is a really incredible thing, and it is necessary. I made a list of very specific things and very specific details that make me really happy, but I have no attachment to.

I'm going to go through this list with you, and it's not in one specific place, these are things that I make mental notes of, these are things that I wrote down in different lists, these are things that I pinned on Pinterest boards. There is not one specific place that I have done all of this, but just looking at all the different manifesting things that I have done, I got really specific around what details I wanted in the house. It's really funny that these just showed up for me, so I'm sharing it with you because of how ridiculous these details are, but how well they showed up for me.

Let me go through the list of details, and then I'm going to check off exactly what happened, and then I'll go through the day and the chain of events that happened for us; all the action pieces that have fallen into place after I've been working on and holding space for this vision for a while. I feel like my manifestations are very much like a slingshot, where I gather details, I gather pieces of information, I start to analyze it, I start to build the picture, I start to see all these many different pieces, but it feels very chaotic. It feels like I have a vision for some of the things I want in the kitchen. I have an idea of I think we're moving to this location, but I have no idea why I've chosen this location. I have no evidence for why this location is correct. I just chose it, and so it could be completely wrong. I could be choosing it out of thin air. There's not a lot of tangibility, there's a lot of intuitiveness to this, and so it feels very chaotic and overwhelming to be in a space where I'm going to a random location that I have not been before. I have not been to Tallahassee, Florida before. I am looking at houses with a realtor that I've never talked to before; my sister-in-law set it up for me. I don't know if I'm going to like the weather. I don't know if I'm going to like the location. I don't know if it's going to feel correct. I don't know if there are really any other options because my husband has already gotten to the school in this area. There was a lot of "this better work". I really had this energy of " this better work", but also, I was quite detached from specific details.

I knew that we were going to go there, and I was going to find something that was going to work for us. I have this vision of all these details in my head, and this very detached perspective of "I'm showing up. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know what's going to unfold, but things are going to unfold correctly". In the back of my mind, I have a very specific list of things that I like and things that I don't like, things I would want in a dream home, and things that I really don't care about.

With this list, it was not a list of expectations. I am holding the energetic state of: I'm finding my dream house. I'm finding a home that's going to meet all my expectations, meet our needs right now, and feel great. I'm going to find a great home for us, a great environment for us, a great location for us. I was holding space for: we're going to end up in the right place, I know we are. I have this very specific vision for the details and the very specific things that make me happy, but these details and these things that make me happy, I'm not saying, and I'm not putting pressure on my dream house has to have these.

I was open to finding the right place, whether it had these details or not. The details are things like floating shelves in the kitchen. I don't know why, but the visual of floating shelves in my kitchen, it's popped up like 10, 15 times over the past year as a desire that I want. It's something that I almost renovated the kitchen in our current house to create, just because it's a fun little visual. It's a fun little detail for me. Floating shelves in the kitchen, not all of them, but some of them. I wanted a pantry with a door. I wanted to be able to open the door and have shelves in there and be able to close the door and close the pantry; that visual is easier for me to organize. Several of the photos of kitchens that I pinned on Pinterest had a black island, and then the cabinets and everything else were a different color. Having an island that's a different color than the rest of the house is something I really liked. The black island, floating shelves, and pantry with a door are all three of those details are in this house.

I wanted big windows in the office, so there's lots of natural light. Both my husband and I have a high need for lots of alone time. He has gate 33, the gate of privacy, as his conscious earth; that's how he grounds himself. That's how he clears out his energy. He has four centers defined and a wide split with his undefined throat center, undefined emotional center, G center, root center. Lots of energy that's undefined there, so clearing out his energy and being in his own environment is really healthy for him. My unconscious sun is gate 40.2, so hermit line plus the gate of aloneness. I do really well when I'm in my own environment and when I can have my own space. In our house right now, we have three bedrooms, and essentially, we have our bedroom, and then we each have an office. We each have our own little room and our own little private space, and several nights a week, we just spend time on our own. We spend time in our own energy. We spend time in our own space. Based on our charts we need a lot of alone time. There are multiple factors, but this is one of the main reasons. For us, it was important that we each had our own space, and we wanted a guest room because people can't stay with us right now, unless we get the mattress set up somewhere, either in one of our offices.

We thought having either four bedrooms or three bedrooms with an office would be perfect. This house has three bedrooms with an office. I like having an open living area; that feels really good to me. There's something about that bright spacious energy that makes me feel like I can breathe. Having all the living area be open, and then the lighting is amazing. There are so many windows; it's so bright. It's perfect. Another small detail of mine was fenced in backyard, two car garage, at least two bathrooms. All those little details, but things like I wanted an outlet on the floor in the living room; that was a detail that was really sticking out to me.

I went through all of these very specific details, of things that would make my home a dream home but were things that if the house that I found did not have floating shelves or it did not have an outlet on the floor in the living room, I wasn't going to be upset. I just needed to be playing in the potentiality and playing with and acknowledging the things that I really like, the things that I do desire, the things that really make me happy and satisfied. It was just acknowledging that I have these desires and holding space for: I'm going to find the right home, and I trust the chain of events, and I trust what's going to unfold, and I trust what's happening. It was a little bit of both of those things.

On the day of events, we got up really early. We left the house at 5:30, because it was a two hour drive, and then we realized that there's a time change, so really it's three hours. We got there, the team who was showing us houses was phenomenal. They did great. They gave us a very educational presentation. I loved them. They were incredible. Then, we went through all the different houses. We walk into this one house, and it's beautiful. The first house that we see has literally everything on our list, and I was like, "Okay, cool. This is a solid maybe". I definitely overheard my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law saying things like, "She's probably going to get this one. I know it's this house. It's probably going to be this house." It was the house I chose. It was the one that really made sense for me. It was the one that I really liked. I ended up going with it eventually.

I wanted to feel through my full emotional wave. As an emotional authority, this tends to be my process: I see something I really like, but I want to be certain. I want to be certain, so I have to feel through what my other options are. We went through a few different houses. I think we saw four or five total, and then we found one on their website that wasn't on a list that they were showing us, but I really liked it as well. I said, "Hey, what about this one?" Turns out that house happened to be in the exact same neighborhood as the first house that we looked at. We went and saw that one. It was good, but it was a little bit smaller. It's one story instead of two. There was just like a couple of small differences; the backyard isn't fence, but it has a little, covered patio area. There was just a couple of little differences. I was like, "Okay, it actually might be this one. I'm feeling a maybe on this one. I like this one too. Can we just go walk back through the first house?"

We walked back through the first house, and as soon as we walked through the door, I was like, " It's this one". The outside is literally on brand my colors. Everything about it, it was perfect. I said that I wanted to put an offer in on this house. The house had been on the market for one day. There were people who were supposed to look at it before us but didn't get the opportunity to. It's new construction, so they don't go into bidding wars. If you're offering the listing price, they take that and run with it, and then everything that we needed fell into place.

It's been 10 days since I picked that house and started the purchasing steps. I went there, I came home, we put our house on the market in less than a week. I've been home for 10 days from this trip. We got our house ready, we showed it, we took the pictures, we listed it, had people come look at it, we have an offer, and we are under contract for our house as well. All this premeditation, all of this looking at charts, playing with ideas, playing with potentials, all of it was this "I have no idea how this is all going to work out," until literally the last 10 days. It's going to be another maybe two weeks of getting things ready before we are moving, we are out of our house, and we were on our way there.

It has been, I would say, at least six months of manifesting in silent, of playing with this vision, of playing with the potentiality for all of this to quantum leap, and all of this to happen and materialize, in a two to three week period. One of the biggest takeaways that I have from this entire experience is patience, being patient when it comes to the fact that all of the details don't make sense, and being comfortable in uncertainty. The vision is coming into place, and I will be honest with you, I was terrified that all of these details weren't going to come into place. I was terrified that everything wasn't going to work out. I was terrified that I was way out on a limb choosing a random location. I felt like I was throwing a dart at a map and saying, "Sure, let's go with this one," with no valid evidence, with no proof, with no rationale, with no reason for the decisions I was making, I was just choosing things because I had to decide. I was terrified that it was all going to come crashing down, and that's been my experience with all of this. There's been lots of things that have been falling into place lately that are much bigger than the manifestations and the goals that I've played with previously. Watching them all fall into place at this level has been an entirely new experience for me, and it brought up every single insecurity, every single fear, every single doubt, every single feeling of am I capable of this? Am I making the right decision? Can I trust myself, even though I'm making this decision, and I don't know why I'm choosing this, I'm just choosing this because it feels correct?

I've learned that sensation, that intuition can guide me, and it can guide people around me. I think what really came up for me this time around of making this decision versus making the decision to just start posting things on Instagram and start my company, was other people are looking to me for these decisions. My husband said, "You go down there. Make this decision. I trust you. Choose our house for us." I chose the location out of nowhere. I'm looking at star charts and astrocartography charts, and that's what I'm basing this decision off. Being in that location, feeling that space, recognizing that it has all the resources that I have, it's perfect, and it felt very random in the process, but every detail has lined up. Every detail has fallen into place, even though it felt super random and super chaotic. It's super last minute and unthought out, unplanned, everything fell into place.

If you feel like you are choosing random details right now, you are making decisions on things that you don't really know why you're picking that thing, but you're just going with it, trust that; even if it feels random, it's probably not random. Momentarily, it might feel random, but big picture, everything is falling into place. Everything is working out exactly how it needs to, and you are safe. That was one of my biggest takeaways. Another one would be, I am so deeply and incredibly supported. I have so many people who trust me. I have so many people who are willing to be there when I break down, willing to hold me when I am having a nervous breakdown, capable of recognizing when I'm stressing myself out and when I'm overthinking, and they will remind me that it's not anything that I have to worry about, and of course the universe. The universe is obviously on my side, and it is safe for me to step into this next level. It is safe for me to grow through this. It is safe for me to trust those intuitive decisions, even if it doesn't make sense.

Lots of big things have come through, but I feel really excited about this new move. I'm very proud of myself for trusting myself throughout this entire process, for letting people help me, and for talking about it because I'm finally getting into the role. I'm finally getting into the flow, and it feels really good to just be able to talk about these stories, talk about the things that are going on. I know that it's going to create valuable content. Also, this is a space for me to just get out all my things. This entire process was amazing to see how much I apply human design and this energetic information to my life, and it has only deepened my level of trust in my intuition, myself, and the universe that's guiding me.


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